Just a little longer...

Desolation,
Wide open space,
Between the trees and me,
Emptiness and me,
Confusion and decisions,
Feelings hard to define,
And I say to myself,
Just a little longer,

Coldness seeps
Its way in,
I am falling deeper,
Into what I fear most,
As I reach out,
There is nothing there,
As possible there was something once,
Only to be gone,
And I say to myself,
Just a little longer,

The sun drops,
The last inch of light falls,
The squirrels more likely to be huddled up,
But not me,
Something I never possessed,
And I say to myself,
Just a little longer,

Then the sun has gone,
Darkness spreads its wings over me,
I see nothing so no one sees me,
Feeling of bitterness only,
And I say to myself,
Just a little longer,

An Owl peers down,
With question in her eyes,
She doesn't have a hope,
In helping me,
As she doesn't see my pain,
Spreads her wings,
Passes me by,
And I say to myself,
Just a little longer,

The soft earth,
Seems the only thing holding me up,
Even then I could slip,
And wondering takes me,
To why and how I got here,
Without even knowing it,
Yet no one notices,
As they didn't see before,
So I say to myself,
Just a little longer,

Shimmering in the darkness,
I see two moons,
Reflecting off a stream of thoughts,
Ongoing forever more,
Along a rocky road,
Slowly giving in to finding a way out,
I take the plunge under the river,
Then the wind carries a whisper,
Gently on a breeze,
'Just a little longer.'

Slow Tears

I look up
as a tear rolls slowly
down my cheek
I think about better days
and wonder if I'll feel that way again
you look at me
with those eyes I know so well
always serious, so deep and insightful
as though you're always in control
But not today
not now
Now you look so scared
like for once you don't have the answer
I gaze at you
looking deep into those hazel eyes
Hoping to understand
why you've said those things you did
I wonder for a moment
if this is all a dream
if I shall wake in the morning
and be relieved
you look at me
with a confusion I have never seen
slowly pull me towards you
and wipe the tears from my cheek

Shadows...

An unnoticed identity clouded,
restless beneath your feet
sorrow life years buried in dirt
billions of cares unforgiven.
Scar a lifeline on granite stone
living wasted nothings
These unspoken distant calls repel,
dying seeds of hateful notes
Use nitrous pins to expose
this evil flesh inside
revealing impure fragile wings
that can't ever be hidden
Yourself seen towards judgement
flow an ocean of tears seeping
downwards to Hell.

Each Passing Moment

All at once I must return
to the blue water,
before so comforting and yet
now strangely insufficient.
The knowledge of you,
too much to bear with
you so far away.

I dread the leaving,
and hate the coming distance,
the start of the grieving
for your love, for your love.

I return to our stars,
my link to you
and all they represented
of you, and me, of ourselves.
The scent of you
incensing me further, with
you not here today.

I dread the leaving
and hate the growing distance,
the start of the grieving
for more love, of your love.

The time is almost upon me
and leaving for even a moment,
tears my heart in two
with no hope of rejoining.
The thought of you
brings tears to my eyes,
stinging, streaming down my face.

I dread the leaving
and hate the cold distance,
the start of the grieving
for all of you and our love.

It's here now, the time
I now die a little inside.
Like a flower denied his sunshine
I cower in the shadow of hopelessness
Waiting......Waiting for you.
The thought of your warmth
regenerates my petals
anticipating your touch,
your kiss and your grace.

I dread the maddening night,
I hate the cloudy skies
that deny me our stars
and, the look of love from your eyes.